Ok so it seems that my tweets from earlier tonight made quiet a few people think Im suicidal !!!!!! LOL Let me assure U that Im NOT suicidal !!!! I like my non existent piece of crap life too much to be suicidal !!! The past two days have been a major down time for me. A few things happened all at once and its been hitting me hard. My aunt whom I love was with us for two weeks and she left today and I miss her dearly !!!!! It almost made me want to cry!! LOL

Another contributing factor to my major down time for the past 2 days is my arthritis. C what U dont know is that my arthritis has really messed up my hormones and every once in a while I get the dreaded PMS !!!!!! LOL Yup U heard ( in this case Read) me right. It takes me into deep depression and very bad mood swings!!! And I will warn U in this state I am NOT my usual self !! if U ever cross me when I am in this state then may god be with U !!For those of U who know me from my old streaming days on ustream the best example of my mood would be like the night Natasha and her then pals invaded my Yahoo Live chat!!! If U were there at that time then U know that was not pretty!! Its during this depression state that Im always reminded of what a shitty and non existant life I have !!! That takes me into deeper depression !!! Now befor U open up your mouth and say " you have a good life" just because U C me living at home with my parents and having home cooked meals, I suggest that U STOP!!!! Thats the part of my life U C on camera!!! I have not and most probably will NOT show U the rest atleast for the time being cause frankly Im just not ready yet!!! I am willing to bet that not one of U will be able to live my life for one day!!!

Another thing that has realy got me upset is that yesterday I managed to offend one of my best and sweetest friends ever and she is still not talking to me !!! She is/was one of the few people I could have serious and intelligent convo with, no offense to my other friends. :( I hope she'll be able to forgive me soon.

So having all these 3 things hit me up very bad the past 2 days it resulted in my tweets earlier tonight. I hope that explains things :) And I also want to thank all my friends who actually got worried about me and tweetd back :) I love yall. And to all of U who didnt give a shit to respond back well then I guess now we know where we stand. Have a good day :)